On the boulevard of broken dreams, you'll find the people who started Andrew Luck, Mike Evans, Shane Vereen, and a bunch of other talented players in seemingly excellent matchups. I have no comforting words to offer because I've been there and I realize the words don't really make you feel any better. So I won't even try, I'll just get to the games, and if you want to post your disappointment below, go ahead. And if you won, that's great, post that too. Just be brief, because you know, those who lost don't want to hear it.
Eagles at Washington: When Washington comes to play they're not bad. Knocked off the Cowboys in Dallas earlier in the season, knocked the Eagles out of the playoffs here. Big game for DeSean Jackson against his former team, good game for Alfred Morris. Respectable game for Robert Griffin III if you don't care about fantasy, which obviously we do. ... Mark Sanchez threw a late interception with a chance to be a hero, instead setting Washington up for the winning field goal. Sorry Sanchez, but that is indeed on you. Good fantasy game for him though, so there's that. Huge game for Zach Ertz -- glad it only took the Eagles 15 games to decide to feature him.
Chargers at 49ers: So this was the game that ended all my preconceived notions about dancing with the one who brought you (not Philip Rivers) and not making same day lineup changes (starting Philip Rivers). I started Rivers, San Diego couldn't run the ball, and he was huge. Huge! Some really big throws, some really big plays by Eddie Royal and Antonio Gates. Good for Rivers, good for the Chargers, good for those of us who started him. ... San Diego doesn't have much of a defense, as Frank Gore and Colin Kaepernick proved. I'm not sure anyone started Kaep anywhere, because what would you have based it on?
Browns at Panthers: As expected. Browns offense didn't do anything save for a badly defended long touchdown to Jordan Cameron. Thrown by Brian Hoyer after Johnny Manziel was knocked out of the game. Another offseason of questions in Cleveland. It's what they do. ... So next Sunday night could be Packers-Lions, or Falcons-Panthers, or maybe Steelers-Bengals? The NFC South game has the appeal of the winner being in, and the loser being out. Sort of crazy how the Falcons could win the division, maybe preventing their coach from being fired. ... Nice game for Jonathan Stewart, quiet one from Kelvin Benjamin. Even with Joe Haden out.
Lions at Bears: So, Jimmy Clausen was a little better than Jay Cutler had been. One of his touchdowns was set up by a special teams mistake, but whatever. Only one turnover. Bears were competitive and almost won. Don't know where that leaves us except Cutler and Marc Trestman unlikely to be back with Chicago next year. Especially Trestman. ... Burned by the Lions defense, but I can't really argue with the ranking. I left the Packers defense on the bench, a 10-point differential. Detroit did put up some duds this year, interspersed with some fantastic performances. Shaky game for their offense, too, another kind of game they had just a little bit too often. Anything can happen, but I expect them to get rolled in Green Bay next week.
Ravens at Texans: J.J. Watt for MVP talk is gaining some steam. It feels wrong to me, but I can't really argue against it. Houston actually has a shot at the playoffs, and he's about all this defense has. And he takes over games. ... Ugly game for Joe Flacco, ugly game called by the Ravens, too. Passed way too often, and that's not Flacco's or this offense's game. Case Keenum actually threw the ball 42 times, too, but Arian Foster threw the only touchdown. Of course. No reason to invest in Houston's passing game next week.
Vikings at Dolphins: Yeah, we all figured Vikings-Dolphins would be 37-35. Wild game with a bunch of unlikely touchdowns, big game by Ryan Tannehill and Mike Wallace, good game by Lamar Miller, and a bizarre loss for the Vikings. And the Dolphins aren't going to fire their head coach, and I suppose they know better than I do. Couple of touchdowns for Matt Asiata, who seems to score in bunches or not at all.
Falcons at Saints: I was still finding my seat when I got the ultimate fantasy kickoff, the Saints returning the kickoff to the 1-yard line, setting up Mark Ingram for an easy touchdown run. And considering he proceeded to do exactly nothing else the rest of the game, like most of the Saints offense, I was very fortunate to get those 6 points there. Score very misleading in this one though. I'm not sure I'd get over this one quickly as a Saints fan. Jimmy Graham had one of those plays that crops up every once in a while where I'm clearly not sure what a touchdown is. He caught a ball at the goal line. Seemed to break the plane. Was wrestled back, and lost a fumble. Pretty huge moment there, considering it would have been 20-14 (and the Saints later drove to make it 20-14, so...). If it's not a touchdown, fine, but how is it a fumble? Forward progressed seemed to be kind of stopped. Whatever. I don't have a horse in this race. Just looked like a bad call and definitely a bad break. Like those facing Mark Ingram.
Patriots at Jets: Another close Jets-Pats game. Not sure why the Pats seem to have trouble with the Jets defense at times but blow them off the field at others. It makes sense when the Jets are actually good, but this year they really aren't. Whatevs, Jets offense useless in fantasy. New England's offense didn't do nearly as much as most people needed, unless you picked up Danny Amendola on news of Edelman's suspension and started him in PPR, which worked out pretty well. New England gets another bye and probably home for the playoffs, what with Buffalo being eliminated later in the day and probably not bringing its A game next week. Though I guess you never know.
Kansas City at Steelers: Not only do I not know what a touchdown is, I don't know what a fumble is, since a critical moment in this game was Jamaal Charles being ruled to have fumbled when his knee seemed to be down. Heath Miller dropped an easy touchdown in this game, frustrating for those of us who started him. Otherwise a workmanlike Steelers win and one of those Kansas City games with plenty of yards but no touchdowns, and I had thought they were eliminated, but I guess if several miracles occur next week they can get in with a win over San Diego. OK then.
Packers at Buccaneers: Evidently Aaron Rodgers had a couple of health issues in this game which had him at less than full strength. That being the case, it would have been nice if they'd pounded the rock with Eddie Lacy a couple of times they got in close, instead of throwing it a bunch down there. Yes I did have Lacy in my Super Bowl, why do you ask? Think I'm OK (facing three Broncos-Bengals players tonight), but it's annoying to see a team throwing passes and giving it to John Kuhn with a back running as well as Lacy is. ... The Bucs are terrible.
Giants at Rams: Rams had been playing a lot better, but they hadn't faced Odell Beckham Jr. yet. It's his fantasy postseason, we're just living in it. Guy's a superstar already, and if you've been winning with him or knocked out by him, all you can do is tip your cap. Guy I'm facing in the Super Bowl benched Eli Manning for Alex Smith, I imagine he'll be kicking himself about that one all offseason if he doesn't come back tonight. Chris Givens caught a long touchdown, interesting for those who had forgotten Given was still on the team. Lance Kendricks, too, proof you can't get too excited about Jared Cook any particular week.
Colts at Cowboys: And here's the ugly game for a lot of fantasy teams. The Colts didn't have much to play for, and boy they sure did play like it. This is why fantasy Super Bowls generally aren't decided in Week 17, because the Colts played their starters, but they didn't look ready to play, and got those guys out of harm's way right quick when things got out of hand. It's a Colts tradition, with Andrew Luck picking up the torch from Peyton Manning. Ugly, brutal and mean. But nice game for Dallas' offense.
Bills at Raiders: Will the Raiders bring back Tony Sparano? Aside from the blowout at St. Louis, they're kind of finishing strong here. Three straight home wins. And next week they might not play any regular Denver starters, so who knows. Impressive win for Oakland, sorry defeat for the Bills. Sammy Watkins and Fred Jackson helped you out if you started them, so at least there's that.
Seahawks at Cardinals: After spending all day feeling good about starting Rivers over Russell Wilson, Wilson went out and was better anyway. This game was actually close and low-scoring for a while until Seattle just opened it up. Anyone betting against the Seahawks going back to the Super Bowl? Great quarterback, great running back, great defense. Other teams have some of these things, but nobody else has all three. ... Ryan Lindley was terrible, but I don't know how many quarterbacks can break down the Seattle defense right now.
Monday, Monday: So I've got a big lead but am facing Jeremy Hill, A.J. Green and Julius Thomas tonight. So we'll see. I'm sure others are either relying on these players or facing them tonight. Not sure what we'll get from this game. Both teams have good defenses, most of the time, but Denver has a couple of linebacker injuries, and Cincinnati has at times been not as good as expected. Denver should win, and selfishly I'm hoping it's fairly low-scoring, say 24-17. Green is the guy who I really think could go off, but he's relying on Andy Dalton, so maybe not. Good luck to all of you.